My husband and I were watching the new this evening, waiting for the weather forecast. I don't normally watch the news, as it seems the television stations believe that we enjoy watching heartache and pain. For whatever reason, it does seem to catch our attention, doesn't it. Devastation, loss, misery, pain, death... why do we watch? What is it in the eyes of the victims that keeps us chained to the television?

I watched the newscast as it reported on the death of a 12 year old girl in a car crash. There were three people in the car; the little girl and her two brothers, a 25 year old and a 14 year old boy. The 14 year old was the driver.

They talked of how the 14 year old had lost control of the car and flipped it, throwing the unrestrained older brother and younger sister from the car. They told us that charges were pending against the survivors.

As they talked, I thought of the parents of these three people and my heart ached. How will this mother ever resolve the storm of emotions she must be feeling at this moment? How will she ever forgive her oldest son for putting that 14 year old behind the wheel of the car? How can she not? He is her first born son. I thought of the two boys, both of whom will surely blame themselves for the death of their sister. How will they bear the enormous weight of guilt? I thought of the little girl. What gifts might she have bestowed upon this world had her life not been so tragically cut short?

Some people believe in fate; that everything in life is pre-ordained and nothing is within our control. They believe that every choice has already been made and that the consequences are inevitable. I can't bring myself to believe that. Some people believe that it is our fate to be purified by pain before we can enter the Kingdom of God. I can't believe that. If we are all creations of God and He is already perfect, then why do we need to be purified?


I have to believe that there is a reason for our existence beyond simple suffering. I have to believe that our choices make a difference; that we can learn from our mistakes. I have to believe that God notices when we make a conscious effort to live and die well. I have to believe that God does not want to cause us pain. I refuse to believe that Satan has that kind of power over us without our consent.

If what we do here on Earth makes no difference, then what is the point of doing anything? There would be no reason to get up in the morning, to go to school or to work. Why bother finding love, getting married, having children? I believe that I'm here to make a difference. We are ALL here to make a difference. God has an ultimate goal for me and he is constantly and gently guiding me toward that goal. All I have to do is be quiet and listen.